Calming an Anxious Mind: Seven Simple and Effective Techniques to Lessen the Feelings of Stress, Anxiety, and Panic
Stress, anxiety, and panic can feel overwhelming. They can keep us from sleep, they can move us to act in ways we wouldn't choose and/or later regret, and they can reinforce or encourage unhealthy habits or ways of being. In short, they can feel awful and keep us from living the life we most want to live.
In my work as a contemplative group therapy facilitator, I have had the honor of working with hundreds upon hundreds of groups, which equates to thousands upon thousands of people, across a vast range of ages, backgrounds, issues, and challenges. In the curriculum that we follow, we discuss techniques for regulating periods of stress, anxiety, and panic, which gives me the opportunity to understand which methods seem to work best for those who experience these emotions most frequently and/or with great severity. Every six or seven weeks, I get to “crowd source” the methods that seem to provide significant relief, according to the people who need them—and are using them—the most.
While what is reported to me in these conversations are far from an empirical analysis or academic study, a handful of techniques come up over and over again, so I thought it would be helpful to share them here. The below seven techniques, then, is not a comprehensive list of every option out there, but rather the “greatest hits” as reported to me from folks who are experiencing these feelings a lot.
All of the techniques here are intended to be simple and easy, and I offer them here as suggestions for experimentation—ideas to keep in the back of your pocket for when you might need to try something. After all, the last thing that anyone wants to do when a hurricane is overhead is to have to put together storm shutters from Ikea.
Lastly, and very important to note, these techniques are not elixirs or panaceas for the underlying causes of anxiety, stress, and panic, but rather simple methods to restore some level of calm—to get to a place where we can think more clearly, ask for help more effectively, or see things from a different and more supportive perspective. If you’re experiencing significant or frequent episodes of stress, anxiety, or panic, please reach out to your doctor or a licensed mental health professional. You can also reach out to me by the information provided below. May this list be of benefit.
So, without any further ado . . .
1. Box Breathing
Box breathing is always one of the first techniques that is mentioned. The technique is simple:
Breathe in for a count of four
Hold at the top for a count of four
Breathe out for a count of four
Hold at the bottom for a count of four
Repeat as necessary, and you don’t have to do it for any particular length of time: a few rounds are usually enough to begin to feel some sense of relief. There are many other wonderful breathing techniques based on counting inbreaths, outbreaths, and holds (such as 4-7-8 breathing), but box breathing is the one that comes up most often.
2. Double Breaths
Clients report this one very often as well, and it’s also a personal favorite of mine (in fact, I begin all of my own meditation sessions with three of these).
Inhale slowly through your nose while pushing your belly out until your lungs are completely full. I like to imagine filling my lungs from the bottom up (hence the pushed-out belly), like I’m trying t give myself a big Santa belly.
Hold that big breath for just a moment—a second or two at most.
Take one more quick sip of air through your nose.
Let it all out of your mouth like a deflating balloon.
Repeat a handful of times - no more than five before returning to a natural breath.
I find that this technique has a very wonderful and immediate parasympathetic effect—I can feel a wave of ease after only a couple of these.
3. Hand Tracing
Like box breathing and double breaths, this technique is breath-focused, but adds a nice somatic addition of touch. For this technique, we’ll time our breathing with the action of tracing the shape of our non-dominant hand using the pointer finger of our dominant hand.
Starting at the base of your thumb, inhale slowly as you trace to the top of your thumb, exhale slowly as you descend from the top of the thumb to the base of your pointer finger.
Inhale as you trace to the top of your pointer finger, and exhale as you descend and trace to the base of your middle finger.
Inhale as you trace to the top of your middle finger, and exhale as you descend and trace to the base of your ring finger.
Inhale as you trace to the top of your ring finger, and exhale as you descend and trace to the base of your pinky finger.
Inhale as you trace to the top of your pinky, and exhale as you descend and trace to the base of your outer wrist.
Moving on from breathing techniques, these next few methods are less about breathing, and more about changing some other aspect of how I’m sensing my current environment.
4. 5-4-3-2-1
The physical sensations of anxiety, stress, and panic are reinforced by my thoughts, so a common thread with all of the techniques in this list is a purposeful redirection of my thoughts to something other than what I’m ruminating on or spiralling about. I think of it like taking my foot off of the gas of what is supplying my “anxiety-engine.” 5-4-3-2-1 is reported very often as a means of doing just this.
Look around the room where you are, and:
Name five things you can see (e.g., computer, phone, tablet, pen, desk)
Name four things you can touch (e.g., keyboard, rug, jeans, book)
Name three things you can hear (e.g., HVAC system, traffic, birds)
Name two things you can smell (e.g., clean shirt, moisturizer)
Name one thing you can taste (e.g., coffee)
In trying this one, notice how it gets a little more difficult as you go, and this is wonderfully by design. As I search for things in my list, my brain is more and more focused on what I can sense, and less and less on the thoughts that are creating my unwelcome anxiety, stress, or panic.
5. Change the Temperature
Changing the temperature can act like a wonderful little reset. This one is mentioned by clients every time.
If you’re hot, get something cold: move to an airconditioned room, drink a cold glass of ice water, hold an ice cube for a few moments, take a cold (or cool) shower.
If you’re cold, get something warm: A warm shower or bath, a hot cup of tea, a nice bowl of soup.
6. The Wonderful Magic of Smell
Like changing the temperature, introducing pleasant scents can serve to break the cycle of an anxious head. A few examples that folks have reported as being helpful are:
Smelling something citrus. A few clients have actually said they keep an orange nearby just in case.
A favorite candle.
Stink balm. No, seriously. More than a few nurses have recommended this one. It’s sort of like lip balm, but for smell. It was apparently developed by nurses who had to work in environments that didn’t smell very good, but a really great secondary use was discovered: it helped them to feel more calm and grounded. Here’s a link to the brand they mentioned most frequently: https://stinkbalmodorblocker.com/
And last but far from least . . .
7. Really Sour Candy
That’s right, really sour candy. Think Sour Patch Kids or Sour Gummy Worms. This is, without a doubt, the one that is mentioned most frequently. I won’t deny that I was surprised when I first heard it, but it has come up countless times (I swear it). Like temperature and smell, clients report that really sour candy can be very helpful in safely and effectively redirecting anxious feelings away from the immediate conditions that are causing them, giving them space to discover something more helpful, useful, or supportive.
Conclusion
There are far more effective ways to reduce feelings of anxiety, stress, and panic than are listed here—these are just the ones I hear most often from folks who unfortunately experience them with great frequency and severity. Again, none of these techniques are presented here as a means to resolve the underlying conditions that are causing the anxiety, stress, and panic, but they can be very helpful in taking the critical edge off of them so that a wiser mind can take the wheel and drive towards solutions that are more meaningful and long-lasting.